Friday Filler!
No, it’s not Wednesday and it’s not wordless, but it is Friday and this is filler.
Hooray!
“Why filler?” you ask. Well, why not? Nobody reads these damn things on Friday anyway. Everybody’s too busy figuring out the best way to get laid over the weekend. Also, as my impending return to Los Angeles draws nearer, my time to get my shit together gets shorter. I don’t even have a plan yet beyond finally getting the hell out of the Sco. I just need to once again immerse myself in the endless beautiful weather and the equally endless beautiful chicks that L.A. has to offer. I don’t really need much; but these things, in particular, make me very happy. Since my simple pleasures are not your problem, however, I’ve reached out to some of the finest bloggers in the world to help me fill a slot or two. This will both keep things rolling and free up a little time for me to get some other bullshit out of the way. I can’t tell you who these special guests will be, but I can tell you that I would trust them with my blog like I would trust them with my sister, which is to say, I don’t have a sister. If I did have one, though, I would surely take back what I just said. But wait, what would Friday Filler! be without a zany image and maybe even an accompanying video. You’re right! Here ya go:
Hooray!
Now, you may also think that Friday Filler! would be the perfect time to respond to memes. You’re wrong! While I appreciate the gesture of being tagged by people like Alex, I have to say that memes aren’t really my thing. They remind me of the scourge of chainletter E-mails that crapped up inboxes everywhere just yesterday. If there’s to be any crap here, it will mostly be my own. I know memes are a way of giving props—and again, I appreciate that—but I like to give props in my own brand of back-handed compliment.
Hooray!
If I Blogroll you or comment on your site, this also means I like you, or I imagine you smell like sugar cookies. If none of these things have happened, however, it doesn’t mean I don’t like you; I just may not have gotten around to it yet. I do have a lot on my plate at the moment. I may also throw out a review somewhere if I think of it, but I have the attention span of an over-excitable puppy and also like to lick chicks’ faces, especially if they actually do smell like sugar cookies.
Hooray!
“Well, what is your deal, then?” you ask. I guess I should clear that up too. What started as little more than a way of staying off the pipe has quickly evolved to become the 10th most important Internet resource for tips on “anal bead usage”.
Hooray!
Not only that, but my site is also the 11th most recognized for its “ability to get laid”. Are you getting a sense of the shape of things to come? Out of all the web sites in the world, 45caliberweb.com is the 11th most likely to get some action. That’s pretty remarkable, isn’t it?
Hooray!
It would seem so, yet I somehow still have a 0 Page Rank. How is this possible? “ability to get laid” = 11th = PR:0. What kind of crap math is that? Exactly whose math-challenged ass do I have to bead over at Google to make this whole Page Rank thing happen? Now, I can understand Google’s wanting to be spiteful because I was running around with WordPress behind Blogger’s back, but isn’t it time to get over it? You can’t protect Blogger forever, Google. She’s a big girl; let her stick up for herself already. And here I thought “ability to get laid” still counted for something. I guess not where Google engineers are concerned. Maybe I should have doctored those Deep Space Nine jpegs after all (man, am I gonna get a smackdown now).
Boo!!
Well, I hope everyone has a nice holiday weekend getting laid, and I’ll be back shortly with less filler. See ya then.
Hooray!
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Wow… Was Ms .45 the original “good girl gone bad”? The only time I’ve been catcalled was when I visited SF, and it was by a girl I thought was a guy. :-(
Jillian’s last blog post..Why Don’t You Come Over To My Place? No Really…
Comment made by Jillian on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 7:04 am
That happens to me here too.
You know what’s weird? When I use OpenID my access code is a series of random images, and the last time I logged on to your site it showed me a picture of exactly 2 scallops on a plate. I can’t believe I didn’t take a screen capture.
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 1:59 pm
Yeah, I’m gonna need some proof!
Jillian’s last blog post..Why Don’t You Come Over To My Place? No Really…
Comment made by Jillian on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 4:29 pm
Well if you go round dropping cherry lube remarks and getting some people a wee bit flustered then no wonder the ability to get laid ranking is quite high :)
Claire’s last blog post..The Devils Kitchen
Comment made by Claire on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 6:50 pm
That’s what I always tell the cops.
It’s just that I don’t think plain lube tastes very good. Blech.
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 6:59 pm
I also had to google sugar cookies to see if I smelt like one, I know you must like me as I am on your sidebar :)
Well the recipes say they have vanilla extract and I have vanilla body lotion, so yes I do :)
Claire’s last blog post..The Devils Kitchen
Comment made by Claire on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 7:09 pm
mmmmmm … cherry-vanilla.
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 21, 2008 @ 7:17 pm
I think I can for give you for not making your memoir public; could probably land you in some serious shit.
Thanks for tagging me in your, erm; Tags.
Comment made by Alex on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 3:16 am
For reals. I get myself in enough shit as it is.
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 3:19 am
I would of never figured out that Sco was San Francisco without that hover your mouse over it thingie. I automatically thought Scotland.
Claire’s last blog post..Hiking in The Devil’s Kitchen
Comment made by Claire on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 12:19 pm
That’s precisely why I do the mouse over it thingie when using colloquialisms, especially ones that are pants. I also do it for bots.
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 1:33 pm
Page Rank? You mean it really exists????
F**K! It’s a conspiracy I tell ‘ya!
Petra’s last blog post..Best One Liners From The Evil Dead
Comment made by Petra on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 4:25 pm
You clever :)
I would like something like that for my britishisms but the technological know how would be too much for me. So I will leave the fancy stuff to you.
Claire’s last blog post..Hiking in The Devil’s Kitchen
Comment made by Claire on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 5:13 pm
Unfortunately. It only bugs me because some listings use it as an inclusion credential, even though it has no relation to quality.
’tis but a simple abbreviation tag. <abbr title=”alternate text”>text</abbr>
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 5:36 pm
I did it! I feel chuffed with myself now :)
Claire’s last blog post..Hiking in The Devil’s Kitchen
Comment made by Claire on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 8:29 pm
Thattagirl! I think I’ll eat some ice cream to celebrate your triumph (gotta have some excuse).
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 8:48 pm
I remember LA, I hated it! I’d gladly take the sunshine and grizzly bears over here, and you can even have all the beautiful women that I left behind out there, cuz I’m nice like that.
Oh, and you were right about Friday’s. I wasn’t here visiting because I’ve been too busy getting laid for the last 28 hours straight!!
Hurray!! ;)
offendedblogger’s last blog post..The Weekender Offender
Comment made by offendedblogger on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 9:41 pm
It’s true. The constant fun isn’t for everyone. I even had to take a break and live somewhere lame for a while, which is only half a joke.
No wonder your masters want to chain you to the radiator. Down girl. Time for some Icy-Hot.
Comment made by .45 on Mar. 22, 2008 @ 10:11 pm