On My Deflowering
I just received news that I’ve won the What Was Willy Reading? contest over at Offendedblogger.com. I’m really beside myself, literally; I was cloned somehow. I wish my mom were still talking to me, because I know she’d be proud of her son’s accomplishment of coming up with dick jokes. In winning this contest, I have officially busted my ad space cherry by giving it up to Offendedblogger.com. I’m not even sure I’m ready for ad space; I haven’t trimmed my treasure trail or anything. Still, it just felt right; not like that time in Junior High under the wood-shop saw bench.
This is a new and exciting time for me. I’m confused by these feelings I’m having. I feel like I may be in love with Offendedblogger.com, but I’ve heard that people always feel this way about their first ad space. Should I call Offendedblogger.com? Should I wait a few days? I don’t want to seem too anxious and scare Offendedblogger.com off. Maybe I should send flowers. What kind of flowers does Offendedblogger.com like, I wonder? Perhaps if I weren’t so focused on giving up my ad space I would have heard it mentioned in passing. Everything just happened so fast. I didn’t even have time to break out my cherry-flavored lube. I guess I did use protection though, because I can see the discarded Magnum wrapper on my pile of syringes. Phew! The last thing I need is a minor double-offender to feed. I didn’t get the clap from this exchange either; or at least, it hasn’t presented yet. My antibiotic Pez dispensers can finally take some time off.
Okay, I’m gonna stop obsessing and just give this thing some time and see where it leads. If you’re here because you heard about my ad space, don’t worry; it’s still on the market. I won’t let myself get tied down by any single blog. There are just too many blogs in the blogosphere, and I’ve got plenty of ad space to go around. No matter what happens though, Offendedblogger.com will always hold a special place in my marketing strategy. Now if you’ll excuse me, I must perform the Forbidden Dance of victory.
Jusqu’à la fois prochaine, Offendedblogger.com…
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That’s AWESOME .45! You’re one of my fave writers, and OB is another … I’m glad other people are noticing!
LOBO’s last blog post..Roller Coaster
Comment made by LOBO on Feb. 23, 2008 @ 3:49 pm
Where was the thanks to Willy?
Get manscaping :)
Claire’s last blog post..What was willy reading?
Comment made by Claire on Feb. 23, 2008 @ 5:48 pm
Nice of you to say, LOBO. Your check is in the PayPal.
I’ll be needing to investigate why my spam filter doesn’t like you all of a sudden. What have you been getting into, and can I please buy some?
Dang, I KNEW my ghostwriters would forget someone! Willy’s ego is big enough already, though. He doesn’t need the extra stroking.
Comment made by .45 on Feb. 23, 2008 @ 5:56 pm
Heh.
No I didn’t bully her too much we agreed on your one.
The next one is going to be far more challenging.
:)
Claire’s last blog post..What was willy reading?
Comment made by Claire on Feb. 24, 2008 @ 4:52 am
Even harder, eh?
Comment made by .45 on Feb. 24, 2008 @ 8:53 am
If a weblogger doesn’t give you the clap from a link exchange, you know you’re in good hands. I enjoyed myself the last time I visited The Offended Blogger…I’ll give her another whirl later.
Qelqoth’s last blog post..Amish Community Praises Internet
Comment made by Qelqoth on Feb. 24, 2008 @ 3:59 pm
Who didn’t?
Comment made by .45 on Feb. 24, 2008 @ 7:21 pm
Oh, heh, I’m sorry… what was your name again?!
I hope you aren’t offended that I waited so long to return your call, but after our last romp I decided to convert to Islam.
No offense, it’s not you. It’s me.
Bwahahaha!!
Chelle B., (B is for Burka wearer)
offendedblogger’s last blog post..The “Hey, Fatwa You Too!!” Offensive
Comment made by offendedblogger on Feb. 25, 2008 @ 11:16 am
At least you didn’t go lesbian humor. That would have really made me feel inadequate.
Comment made by .45 on Feb. 25, 2008 @ 2:15 pm
Congrats on getting your cherry popped!
diesel’s last blog post..It’s Inappropriate Card Day Eve!
Comment made by diesel on Feb. 25, 2008 @ 7:43 pm
As if all this wasn’t exciting enough, you should probably hop on over to my blog for further excellent news…
Fanton’s last blog post..Judgement Day
Comment made by Fanton on Feb. 25, 2008 @ 8:55 pm
It was well worth the years of stretching exercises.
The DNA tests came back negative??
Comment made by .45 on Feb. 27, 2008 @ 5:42 am