.45 Caliber Headspace

My world is small, I find…sometimes. Do you ever feel like that, like your world is smaller than you thought it was? I have traversed the entire circumference of my world and I have to admit, it’s not that big. I mean, it’s not SO small, my world. It’s actually about the size of the rock that dude, Sisyphus, from Greek mythology, had to keep rolling up the hill, and much like Sisyphus, because of my trickery…I’m always crafting trickery, by the way. I love to craft and when I craft, it’s usually trickery that I’m crafting…but much like Sisyphus, I too am condemned to continuously having to roll my world up a hill. Some days I don’t want to do it. I just want to sit on the hill with a Tang and a chili dog, but no, I have to roll my stupid world up the damn hill, so no Tang and chili dog for me.

Anyways, because my world is small, a while ago, some friends were talking to me about Asian chicks and I got all emphatic, saying “Stop talking to me about Asian chicks all the time. I don’t like them!” I believe I even banged my fist down for emphasis at this point. It’s not that I had anything against Asian chicks, you see. I was just like “I’m NOT attracted to them. They don’t get my juices flowing.” Brawny paper towels, by the way, great for picking up flowing juices. But yeah, Asian chicks just weren’t my cup of tea. My cup of tea has bourbon in it, unless it’s morning, and Asians don’t like bourbon as far as I know. They prefer liquors that weren’t distilled in the backwoods of Kentucky. So, what happens? Too soon after, I met a nice Asian chick, which was great, except I was forced to recant my previous tirade. I had to officially withdraw it from public record. “OK, they’re not so bad!” Pounding fist, emphasis. Then, a funny thing happened to my world. A whole new continent appeared out of nowhere. I spotted it while rolling my world up the hill. The teutonic plates of my world had shifted and a new continent had sprung up from the lower depths. My world, now bigger. Unfortunate when having to roll it up a hill all the damn time.